Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
