Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
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