I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
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