mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
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