C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize