Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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