why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
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