ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize