I love you and miss you, which in no way dimishes how much I hate the person you turned out to be, but I still love and miss you.
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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