There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
Everything about him screamed your future.
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
