I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
Actions speak louder than pants.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
