he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize