As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
The hospital said it would be 'irresponsible' for them to allow people to book stomach pumps.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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