we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
