have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
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