OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Well I never thought in the future I'd be able to say "hey remember that Easter I made porn?"
I just gargled with NyQuil
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize