Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
Randomize
