Can i not drive my cunt home
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
How high are you?
I feel like breakfast can just fly into my mouth
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
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