No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
