i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
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