You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
nah we got kicked outta the bar after the bouncer saw us putting straws up Chelsea's nose to make her look like a walrus after she fell asleep at the table
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
