I think i peed on brittanys purse
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
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