i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
I don't remember much of last night. But I woke up with very apologetic texts from him this morning so apparently I didn't get laid. Which is stupid.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
