But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
When you get here, kick me in the balls. It's really important. - I'll explain later.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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