This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
I just had sex on a roof
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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