you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
Randomize
