It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
