Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
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