Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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