More tranny stories later!
I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
Themes for tonight: men who look like bill Gates but sing smash mouth songs. Women who's names are also food. Haircuts that DO NOT cover bald spots.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
How ya feelin sunshine?
Like a million dollars! ... That has been hit by a bus, drowned under water and beat repeatedly by a shovel.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Randomize
