SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
where am i from again
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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