Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
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