I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
You left a skid on my bar stool!!!!
Oops! Sorry about getting stool on your stool!
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
