what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
The waiter to-go cupped my bloody mary without me even asking. THAT hungover.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Okay so I'm high eating chili cheese fries bra-less watching Mulan, could I be doing any better at life right now?
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Randomize