was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
I'm being hhit on by creepy guys please come one bought me a penis hat balloon animal save meeeee
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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