If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
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