the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
YOU RAISED A SWORD OVER YOUR HEAD AND SCREAMED AT HIM WHAT THE FUCK ELSE DID YOU THINK WOULD HAPPEN?!
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize