she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
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