the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
