Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
Randomize
