dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize