it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
