Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
Just filled up my pledge keg goblet with coffee at bp. They can judge all they want. At least I'm not killing baby dolphins.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
i think my cat just said my name.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
Randomize
