the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
Randomize
