If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize