just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
party gras won. party gras always wins.
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
