You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
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