Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Every concussion has its silver lining
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Randomize
