If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
Randomize
