I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
I woke up in a trash can. Please dude. I don't know what I did to you last night, but I'm sorry. Epically sorry. Please call me back. Please.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
